ARE U BORED FROM INFORMATION

PLZ ENTERTAIN URSELF WITH SOME FUNNY JOKES!!!!

1.Did you hear about the new restaurant on the moon? Great food but no atmosphere!!!

2.Three couples are dining together.

The American husband says to his wife: “Pass me the honey, Honey”.

The English husband says to his wife: “Pass me the sugar, Sugar”.

The Lebanese husband says to his wife: “Pass me the steak, Dumb cow”

3.It was Christmas time and this woman invited all her family to her house to eat.

So they gathered around the table and she asked her son to pray.

 He said: "But I do not know what to say."
She said: "Say what I said this morning."
So he said: "Dear God, why did I invite all these people to my house?"

4.The Walton's invited their new neighbors over to dinner.

 During dinner Mr.Walton was asked what he did for a living.
Eight years old Brian Walton jumped in and said, "Daddy is a fisherman!"

To which Mrs.Walton replied, "Brian, why do say that. Your daddy is a stockbroker, not a fisherman."
"No mom. Everytime we visit dad at work and he hangs up the phone he laughs, rubs his hands together and says 'I just caught another fish'."

5.A bicycle can't stand alone because it is two-tired.

6.Yo momma is so stupid. She tried to put M&M's in alphabetical order.

7.Yo momma is so fat; when she was lying on the beach Greenpeace tried to push her back in the water.

8.Confucius's once said, "When you breathe, you inspire, and when you do not breathe, you expire."

9.Handy guide to modern science:
If it's green or wriggles, it's biology.
If it stinks, it's chemistry.
If it doesn't work, it's physics.

10.What did the antibody go to the Halloween costume party as?
As an "immunogobulin

11.How do you tell the sex of chromosome?
Pull down it's genes


Two  atoms are walking down the street.

Says one atom to the other, "Hey! I think I lost an electron!"

The other says, "Are you sure??"

"Yes, I'm positive!"

A group of organic molecules were having a party, when a group of robbers broke into the room and stole all of the guest's joules.  A tall, strong man, armed with a machine gun came into the room and killed the robbers one by one. The guests were very grateful to this man, and they wanted to know who he was. He replied: My name is BOND, Covalent Bond.